Throughout out lives, we are put through many not-so-pleasant life experiences and tough situations. But sometimes, we go through something that is exceptionally hard for us to deal with. And oftentimes we may have a hard time dealing with how we feel about those times, even many years after it happened.
Whenever we have lingering traumas and old heartaches that keep resurfacing, it helps to write a letter to our past selves. Writing a letter to who you were in the past can be cathartic and help make sense of the event that affected you. And using the knowledge you have now and reflecting on how far you have come can help gain closure, peace, and a sense of power.
For this week’s blog, we are sharing a letter that Rosemary wrote to her younger self. We hope after reading Rosemary’s letter, you might be inspired to write a letter to your past self as well.
You’re only 18 and yet you have already been through so much. Most people will never know how much exactly. And that is fine, too. I wish I could tell you that it will be smooth sailing from here on out, but unfortunately there’s so much more to come. However, don’t let that discourage you. You’ll have me with you for all of it and even though I can’t promise you a “happy ever after,” I can tell you that there will be a “happy again.”
Even if life won’t be any easier, you’ll become much better at finding your strength to navigate the harder things and they will not seem quite as daunting. And it won’t be all doom and gloom! You will have great friendships, some of which you have started to build now. You’ll know what it is like to love and be loved. Most importantly, you will learn to love most of yourself (it’s a work in progress).
I know you have a lot of insecurities because of what has happened to you, and because of the struggles you are going through now. Here are three things that I wish you’d know sooner rather than later.
Most of all, I want you to know that… You Are Good Enough.
Sadly, you are the only person you can rely on. You’ve always known that deep down. You are literally doing the best you can with what you have, which hasn’t been much. You’re not perfect, but you are constantly learning and adapting, which will serve you well in life. You’ve already learned that good things are temporary. Well, so are bad things. Take the time to enjoy and be present in those positive times. You deserve it. You deserve to be happy.
Stop Trying to Make Everyone Else Happy
Just because what you have gone through has made you strong, it doesn’t mean you deserve other people’s problems on top of your own. I know you feel like helping others will make you feel better, but in the long run it will make you feel unappreciated and drained. Yes, even if it initially does make you feel good about yourself. How other people behave is not your responsibility and excusing their behavior will not change anything. Other people’s happiness is on them. Only yours is on you.
Moving on is not the same as running away
You can’t run from yourself. You will take all your insecurities and unhappiness with you. Happiness is not a job, a relationship, a place, it is a state of mind. You will find people and places that allow you to be a You that you like. Find those earlier, keep them longer, and give yourself permission to make that You your priority. It’s not selfish to build the life you want. It’s necessary.
Screw Your Fears, Live Your Dreams
You don’t need anyone else to believe in you, which is good because there’s been a decided lack of that in your life so far, hasn’t there? If you’ll allow yourself to admit it, you know you have the power in yourself to do pretty much whatever you put your mind to. Because you are not scared to get out of your comfort zone and take risks, you will do incredible things — for other people, for other people’s companies. Don’t push your dreams aside for others. Figure out what You want and put that inner ninja to work on getting it. It hasn’t happened yet, but I’ve started on it, finally.
All things that happen, good and bad, will continue to shape who you are. Without these experiences, you would not be you.
No matter what happens you won’t feel like you are lonely for much longer. You will have great friends that will be your support system in life. Friendships that will last for decades. You will have a furry companion that will even save your life, and you will, at times have loving relationships. And you will learn that alone doesn’t mean lonely.
Through all of it, try to remember that I love you. You may not always believe it, but it’s true. I believe in you, even if you don’t and I will never give up on you. Together we will navigate the ups and downs of this life and make it our own.
With all my love,
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